Wednesday, December 19, 2007

That's what you thought

I was chatting with a girlfriend yesterday and realized something. My life is nothing looks like something I recognize.

This happened before P3 and I broke up. Some of it good and some of it bad, but truly unrecognizable.

Last Year:
  • Doing the limbo with New York
  • Single and loving it
  • No job
  • Kinda fat
  • Working at the hotel (depressing)

This Year:

  • Living in Vancouver - who saw that one coming
  • Single and not loving it right now
  • Great job
  • Not so fat

The thing that really bugs me, is since I have moved out here, I haven't been comfortable. Part of that had to do with my living situation, you see, P3 is very much enjoys renting a house and having others rent rooms from him.

I am not.

I like my own space, I want to get my toast in my bra some mornings and why shouldn't I? I have earned the right to nudity.

So for the past three months, I have been living in this situation with a boy I deeply care about not really enjoying it. Sure I got used to it, but there is something to be said for loving your life.

God do I miss loving my life.

And I did. I LOVED my life. Do what I want, when I want. Not answer to anyone or have to respond to any questions. Life was mine. UGH

I fucking hate breakups.

This is why I never dated.

Sorry, went on a tangent there. The really frustrating part of these past two weeks has been the apartment hunting. It is frustrating and depressing and may cause me to jump off a bridge - thankfully there are a few to choose from here. I have seen SO many apartments, most I hate but still can't afford and the ones I like, I REALLY can't afford.

How do people live in this city? I mean, NY, I got it, it is worth starving to live there. But seriously, Vancouver, what the fuck?

There you go, one more rant for the day.

And ... in the past week I have heard the same Beach Boys song like 8 times, when I don't actually remember hearing it more than once ever before. Why do things like that happen? Once you notice something, it keeps on popping up. It can't just be coincidence can it?

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