Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Rant o' the day

Let me preface this by saying: this has nothing to do with children. Or choosing to have children. Most of my family and friends have kids - most of which I love. In fact, I quite like kids.

This rant is for the assholes that bring their 8 month old to a packed movie theatre on a Tuesday night.

Kids are an inevitable part of life. I have to deal with them all the time, and I am able to smile and coo with the best of them. Like I mentioned, I quite like kids.

Children should not be a part of my movie-going experience. If you are bringing your children to the theatre, they should understand "SHHHH".

At the very least, they should be able to sit in a chair by themselves.

Because when they are too young, you are likely to ruin the movie for someone else.

Like me. Tonight.

First, you let your cute little girl play on the stairs.

Yes, the stairs. You were only three rows from the top and she was far enough away from you that a tumble was conceivable.

Second, while your cute little girl is playing on those stairs, please keep her away from my feet. Not only is it totally distracting, it is also a little scary - the last thing I need is a mother blaming me for their kid flying down the stairs.

Third, when your cute little girl crying, please remove her and you from my movie. There are matinees that cater to families. Please, go to those.

Thanks to this mom, and her crying baby, at a theater on a Tuesday night, I missed a seemingly important scene, was irritated and had to scold a mother - yes people, if you're child is bothering me, I will inform you.

And now, to top it all off, I am going to pay another $12 to see the movie because of this all.

Ugh.

Although, now, Tuesday movies are super cheap - $11.45 for a movie, popcorn and a drink.

What the what?!

Anyways, did I mention I actually like kids?