Today I knew, I made the right decision

Obviously I didn't really talk about the happenings of the past month or so. They have been a little complex, so I needed to get my head straight before I could articulate what's up.

After today, I think I'm ready, so let me try.

A few weeks ago I had a job offer in Toronto.

Yes, I said Toronto. I wasn't necessarily looking to leave my current job, I've talked about how much I love it after all. But I do like the idea of getting some interview experience and keeping your resume fresh. So whatever, I randomly applied for a job in Toronto that I wasn't qualified for.

But I was given an offer anyways. Apparently, I'm marketable.

This job offer was lovely. The firm seemed great, the people super nice and the work interesting. It would have been a lateral move - no doubt - but it wouldn't have been a bad move. In fact, I think some people believe it would have been a really good move.

I digress.

I received this offer, thought about it, talked to my bosses about it - after all, for the past three years, they have been my most tangible mentors - but then chose to decline it.

In seeking advice from all fronts, my friend Josh said "Whatever decision you make, it will be the right one."

I thought it was nice advice, but didn't fully believe it until today.

You see today, I found out a stupid, uncharacteristic mistake I made almost got us fired. A client was so upset with my work, that it almost resulted in us losing the account.

I wanted to die.

While I like to pretend that I have a pretty pulled-together life, in reality, the only pulled-together thing I have is work. It's the only place I am confident, capable and moving in the right direction.

My personal life is a mess.

Again, I digress.

I haven always prided myself on being good at my job. I have never been fired from anything and the idea that something I did put my agency in a precarious position really got to me.

I spoke to my boss about it in general terms, as this information was given to me in confidence. As she reassured me that the loss of a client will not result in the loss of my job and that this company believes in me, I knew:

I definitely made the right decision.

So, for the first time, I chose Vancouver. I chose it over the bright lights, big city of Toronto, which, in turn, means I may have chosen it over New York.

Who knew that would ever happen?

Old New York

My love affair, subsequent depression and continued pining for New York have been documented quite well here. So I won't go into painful detail, yet again, about how much I love love love NYC.

Because I do.

Everything about that time of my life made me happy. And the memories still do.

But I am a little ... scared of NYC now.

Not, like scared but, something.

You see, I worry that if I ever visit NYC again, I will never leave. The energy would be too much and I will succumb.

I just know it.

I would end up quitting my job, moving there on a whim and becoming a life-long waitress. (not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just I'm a little too ... obsessive to be a waitress. I also really hate people)

But still, NYC makes me soo fucking happy. Even just knowing it is there, should I ever wish to visit or anything, comforts me.

Like a toxic ex-boyfriend though, I know, it would not be a good thing for me to visit him right now. Or for a little while.

I have things I need to finish before I can trade my life in for my fantasy life.

Inspiration

It comes in weird places. Sometimes it is an incredible quote. Sometimes it is a stupid comedy. (Who hasn't wanted to blue themselves?)

You just never know.

Well, the inspiration for this post came from my friend Tej. He recently fulfilled a dream of his by traveling to Green Bay, Wisconsin and seeing his non-homosexual dream man, Brett Favre, play in a playoff game, at Lambeau.

I have been lacking inspiration lately. I think the end of my relationship has left me a little ... off.

So, this is my attempt at getting inspired. Here, for your reading pleasure (browse away now)

My Big 5
(in no particular order)

New York

Let's not lie. Its no secret. I heart NY. Everything about it is perfect in my mind. EVERYTHING. I would give almost anything to live there and everything I do is to best position myself to get there. A bit of an obsession? Yes. P3 once said he hated the way I would talk about NY because it was like I was talking about an ex that broke my heart, but I am still pining over. NY, I am still pining.


Write a TV Show

God do I think this would be great. I have thrown ideas around with friends, but nothing near serious discussions. How great would that be?! 'Oh, what do you do for a living?' 'Well, I write a TV show'. AWESOME.


Write a Book

This would be fantastic. To put that much dedication, that much of yourself, that much of your life, into something (anything) would make life worth it. Long after you are dead, you are still alive. Isn't that what humanity strives for?


Go to Africa

More than anywhere else on the planet, Africa is where I want to go. The whole continent. While I am there, however, I would have to swim with the sharks in South Africa. The 'Holy fuck' feeling that must go through your body must be incredible.


Spend a Year in Dubai

Hi, they built an island that looks like the globe. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to live in a society where that kind of opulence is commonplace, whoa. I am pretty sure I would only do it for a year, but how incredible would it be? (Not to mention, I hear you can make a KILLING!)


This list is small, but I can't share EVERYTHING with the web. Somethings are just too personal.

It's Not You, It's Me

Dear New York City,

This is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. To leave you like this. I really want you to know, it's not you, it really is me. I know others have said this, but believe me when I say it. I don't want to be with anyone else but you.

I loved you before I met you. I would see you from across the world and I knew, we were meant for each other. How could I not? You are everything I have ever wanted. Older, more sophisticated, beautiful, full of new and exciting experiences. You have been through hardship, only to come out of it stronger and more kind. And let's not lie, you are HUGE!

I will never forget the first time we met. I knew my instincts were right from the first second. I knew you were it. You filled me with an energy I had never known before. It was intoxicating. I was heartbroken then when I had to say goodbye, but I never knew I could feel this sad.

Everything about you is magical. You have a way of making a girl feel like the only girl in the world, like you want no one else and that this love affair is exclusive. Even though I always knew you had others, I liked that you made me feel secure in our relationship. You make me feel safe and at home, like no one else has.

You are so multifaceted and eclectic. One day its a museum, the next a concert at a dive bar. You are comfortable anywhere and everywhere. Everyday with you is something different and - for a random girl like myself - this suites me just fine.

You have shown me fine dining, great theater, sports I could have only dreamed of seeing, music I could have only heard on my iPod, people I never thought could exist, a kindness I thought was missing and a feeling I thought I was lacking - unbridled excitement.

There have been no bad memories. Even though you sometimes stink, you cost me a lot of money and I have suffered more heartache because of you, I will never stop wanting us to be together. For me there is no one else above you.

I know it is timing, because chemistry like this cannot be faked (even by my overactive imagination). We just work, you and I. Like two puzzle pieces. Even though this relationship was brief, you made me realize what I want in this world and what I deserve aren't mutually exclusive. I am my best when we are together. I hope you know this. While I was never cool enough for you, you make me be the person I want to be, the person that is often hiding or too scared to come out.

While this isn't our time, I know we will be together someday. I feel it in my bones. I will come back to you a little older and a little wiser, and our relationship will flourish. I promise.

This is a break, not a break-up. I would never break up with you. I do, in fact, love you. In a way I have never loved before.

So, thank you New York. Thank you for existing. Thank you for being a beacon of culture and light in America. Thank you for being kind and generous and exciting and beautiful. You fulfill every aspect of me and this will not be forgotten.

Love,

Iris

P.S. Is it ok if I call you for a booty call once and a while??

Happy Birthday Ms. Eve

Sunday was Harp and Craig's last day in NYC. It also happened to be Eve's birthday. So we all got up (this was a big slumber party weekend, with Eve and I on the pullout and Harp and Craig on the air mattress in the living room) got dressed, watched a couple episodes of Entourage (I get everyone addicted to that show) and then we all went on our merry ways.

Eve and I decided to walk all day and see what this city has to offer. We walked from the UES to SoHo. For those of you unaware of the distance, it is about 100 blocks. Along the way we shopped a bit, but mainly just walked and hung out.

For Eve's dinner she had the idea of going to Tao. It was a great meal, probably the best sushi I have ever had in my entire life. I just have to say, "Wow".

After we stuffed our bellies full, we sat by the Plaza Fountain. I love this fountain, and have to say it is probably my favorite little spot in the city. It is just so old school NYC. The Plaza, Central Park, Fifth Avenue. It's the New York from movies. It is the New York you see and think, "Wow, I might like to visit New York one day".

So that was our weekend. It was fun, random and no one was arrested (thank god we knew when to cut off Harp)

Thank you to Eve, Harp and Big Daddy for coming. I think I would have been too depressed if y'all had not been here.

Tomorrow, my last NYC post. So very very sad.


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Saturday Night Live

As I mentioned before, Eve and I are obsessed with SATC. We love this show and we always have. So, obviously, this weekend was going to have an SATC theme. (Much to Craig's dismay, I am sure)

Friday night we went wandering around the East Village drinking, trying to find a place to hang out. I am not going to lie, this is the first time Little Italy and the East Village disappointed me. The food in LI was not very good and the random fun that usually accompanies the EV wasn't there. Ok, fine, not a HUGE deal.


Saturday we awoke, went down the West Village and put our name on the wait list for Pastis and went walking around. Found some cool little shops etc, and saw Nigel Barker - from America's Next Top Model! While I don't watch this show regularly, I do watch it enough to have seen Nigel and noted how HOT he is on tv. Lemme tell ya, he is ACTUALLY that good-looking. He was walking around the neighborhood with his kid. SO cute.

We head back to Pastis and get our table. At this point Harp was actively searching for celebs, for those of you who know our little Harpy, you know this is not something you would expect her to do. Hahaha, the celeb-obsession begins!

While we are sitting and eating, Elisha Cuthbert walks in. At this point, I am pretty sure she is stalking us. Ok, while Nigel was totally good-looking and didn't disappoint in person, she kinda did. She is cute, sure, but nothing to write home about. A little disappointing.

We finished brunch and made our way down to the WTC site. Big Daddy hadn't seen it and Eve wanted to hit Century 21. I wasn't in the mood for shopping, so I found a pub and waited for the football games to start.

The rest of the group came and met up with me when they were done supporting the NYC economy and we walked to Canal Street and SoHo.

After shopping some more, we made our way home. Dinner for the evening was going to be Tortilla Flats, a Mexican restaurant that was featured on SATC. This place was awesome! The food was great and not expensive at all. The whole meal for all four of us came to $50! Can you imagine?!

Saturday night is also MisShapes night at Don Hill's. The MisShapes are these DJs who are basically the three coolest people in NYC. They have had Madonna guest DJ for them and often feature secret shows by the likes of the YYYs and The Strokes. So we go.

Boy, this was not our scene. I am talking about hipsters and little mod kids the likes of these eyes have never seen before. I was wanting to leave, as this was not what I was expecting, but then this band gets on stage. No it wasn't any major bands, but it was a really great group from Brooklyn. They were called The Pretty Boys and they totally rocked.

I then lost my wallet and this put a very abrupt and unnecessary end to the evening. Ugh. I am not losing stuff girl and this is the second time in two months that I lost my wallet after not losing anything for like five years! WTF!

Ok, I will post about the rest of our weekend later. I got up kinda early to see Eve off and now I want to sleep.

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Holy Martha!

Ok, so I have had some FABULOUS days in this city and today was NO different! Today was celeb-fabulous!

Everyone arrived at an OBSCENE hour this morning. I am talking like 4:30 and 6:45 AM. Can you imagine? When we all congregated, we took a little nappie nap and got ready for our day. Big Daddy hasn't been to New York before, so we took the subway and made our way to Times Square, with a pit stop at Grand Central Station.

We go to Times Square and hang out for a bit in the area. Now, one thing I had yet to see in the city was the Letterman studio. Can you believe it?! Me, who has Dave as one of her top three celebrities to get it on with. We went to the Letterman studios and saw the Hello Deli (you know, Rupert Gee's Hello Deli). Big Daddy even ordered a Letterman sandwich and he got it from Rupert! Uber-cool!

We then walked through Midtown and made our way to the Plaza where Eve and I were meeting the Sex and the City tour. Both of us are very into SATC. VERY into it. We went on the tour and saw a ton of the sites where the girls hang out etc. We got to sit on Carrie's stoop and as we are waiting to get our pic taken, we see Nina Katz (she was the one that made the face to Carrie when they met) walking her dog. How random and cool. Sure she isn't a major celeb or anything, but still a little weird, right? On the SATC tour and a person that was on SATC walks by. Again, uber-cool.

We finish the tour and meet up with Big Daddy and Harp. They went to the Financial District and on the Staten Island ferry. We then begin the walk to my apt.

On the walk we see a film crew and big lights, so we decide to check it out. It is the new Elisha Cuthbert / Jesse Bradford movie that is filming in the city. While we didn't get to see them making the movie (it was all the stand-ins doing rehearsals) we did see them as they were walking to the set. Let me tell ya, Jesse Bradford (he was the really cute guy from Bring It On - one of the best teen movies EVER) is very cute in person as well.

So that was our day ... so far. Great minor celeb-filled day. I freaking love this city!


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Too Much Excitement for One Weekend

Holy shit is this weekend going to be awesome. I really don't know how to describe the fun that will be had in NYC this weekend.

First Eve is coming to co-celebrate our birthdays, hers is on the 14th and mine is on the 17th. She is older than I am by three days, which when we are old and grey will make all the difference in the world to me. We have not celebrated our birthdays together in five years. That was a blowout party in Vegas for our 21st. I also haven't seen her in over a year. Can you imagine? UNACCEPTABLE!!!

Second, and this was a last minute trip, Harp and Big Daddy are coming for a visit too! YAY! These two world travelers have been gone for so long that I have only seen Harp for two days in the past year and Big Daddy, well I have only seen him once since June! This again, is UNACCEPTABLE!!!

We should have a good time. I mean, so long as Harp doesn't get arrested, Big Daddy doesn't pick up any hookers and Eve doesn't get lost in the shops on Canal Street (the first and last are probably the most likely to happen, as I have yet to see a hooker in the city)

So, who's excited for this weekend? ME!!!


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Wow, this totally isn't my scene.

I was sitting in the apt last night trying to figure out what to do. So I went on myspace to check and see if there were any shows going on last night. I then went on Village Voice to search. There were a couple options, all downtown.

I got ready, called Harp and told her to tell me to get my ass out of the house and stop being a loser. Harp is REALLY good at doing stuff like that. Tell it like it is.

I decided on a show at Canal Room. His name is Mark Shine. The Village Voice said to "check out this rising star before you can't get tickets". So I did.

I took the subway all the way downtown, got out of the station and realized that Chinatown is a very different scene at night than it is during the day. It is a little disconcerting to see this usually bustling street deserted. I put on my bitch-face, so no one messes with me, and walked the six blocks to the venue.

Now I was going into this blind. I had heard a couple of his songs on his myspace page and thought what the hell. I pay the $10 to get in, and realize that this is a total reggae scene. Wow, not my scene at all. I didn't realize that this was also a bit of a club too. I thought it was just going to be a show.

I grab a beer and chill out. After listening to some really good reggae and having a couple of beers, the show starts. He really was awesome. A really cool mix of reggae on the rock-tip. Had a classical violinist on stage with him for an amazing song. He really didn't disappoint.

The only thing that bugged me was the guys. Just because I am there by myself doesn't mean that I want to hang out with you. It doesn't mean you can disrupt my enjoyment of this really small show. It doesn't mean I want you to tell me what clubs are hot tonight. What it does mean is that I am here by myself, to enjoy some music and to get out. LEAVE ME ALONE! I get that a girl by herself is an easy target. Oh, she must not have any friends or a boyfriend, so she must be dying to talk to someone. NO! And when I say that I am good not hanging out with you and your friends and that I don't want you to buy me a drink, don't leave and come back. I haven't changed my mind in the past 10 minutes. In fact, now you are just annoying me and I am going to tell you that.

Sorry for the rant. All-in-all, the show was great. I accidentally stepped out of my box and ended up having a really good time. Other than the two annoying guys, the crowd was totally chill. I got a little nervous when I thought I saw Suge Knight (you know, the guy that killed Tupac) there, but there wasn't a shooting, so I doubt it was him.
Hahaha, could you imagine??

Looking for another show tonight, so maybe I will again, have something for you tomorrow.


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Three Small Town Albertan Do NY Right

As I alluded to in my last post, Jarod and Steve came for New Year's Eve. I was super excited. I love my parents, but I was in need of some interaction with people that laugh at my jokes. Jarod hates laughing, so thank god Steve was with him.

I picked them up from the airport and we returned to my apartment to get ready and grab a bite to eat. Since I am a creature of habit, I suggested we walk around the West Village and see what is available. We found this cool little restaurant and ate. Had some drinks and found out where a couple of gay bars were in the neighborhood.

We walked to the gay bar and realized it was a major club. None of us were really in the mood for a big club, so we reenacted mine and Jarod's last trip here. We bought a couple of bottle of beers and brown-bagged-it around the East Village. I love the East Village. Eclectic and youthful, with little-to-no pretense. We continued to drink and enjoy the neighborhood. We didn't hit any bars or anything, and then just made our way back to the apartment.

Saturday came. We got up and went to the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I have said this before, but the Met is truly awe-inspiring. The vastness of this museum is incredible. You have an inherent appreciation for the stuff here simply because most of it is so freaking old.

After a few hours at the Met, we were getting a little hungry. Grabbed some pizza and decided to hit Little Italy for dinner. We subwayed it to Union Square, my old stomping grounds, and walked to Little Italy. I am a firm believer that you can't really see a city unless you are walking it. Walked through SoHo and down Broadway. Found some great street finds and eventually made it down to Little Italy. Found a good little dive restaurant and had some cheap, but good Italian.

Saturday night is when the insanity started. One of our street finds told us about this party in the West Village. He was selling some really good house c.d.s so we trusted that this would be a decent party. We come home, put on our Albertans-in-New York best and hit the town.

We get to the party and it is in this warehouse or gym of sorts. The crowd is super cool and chill and some KILLER music. There was a dance-off that Jarod participated in. He busted out some Ukrainian dancing on a breakdance tip. It was awesome. I have never been more in awe of him in my entire life.

We stayed at the party till like 5 in the morning. Jarod got VERY drunk and fell out of the cab when it stopped by my apartment. HILARIOUS!

Sunday was painful. We only got out of the apartment around 1:30 pm. We are not 18 anymore, and sleeping after drinking that much is much appreciated.

We then get our hungover asses out of the house and hit MoMA. I really like a lot of the stuff at MoMA, but there is a huge chunk of it that I just don't get. Modern art is a little over my head. Like a red canvas, sorry, I don't get it. So, meh, we finished that and then went to Grand Central Station. Every time I have been in GCS before, I have been running to catch a train or heading somewhere. I have never had a chance to hang out in the terminal and appreciate how cool it is. Very nice.

Finished at GCS and went to meet my parents for dinner. This was a typical Dias dinner. I mean, dad was harassing the wait staff, I was getting annoyed, mom was trying to keep it together, and poor Jarod and Steve got to witness all of this. Good times.

We did nothing of interest for NYE. We were tired, had no desire to stand in a crowd of 1 million people (yes, 1 million people) to see the damn ball drop, so we came back to the apt and hung out here. Didn't even really realize it was midnight till it was after midnight. Haha, I hate New Year's. So much expectations for a night that is usually just mediocre.

All in all it was an ab fab trip. I love having people here to talk to and laugh with and do the shit I want to do.

Next up ... Eve in 11 days! YAY!!!! I am so fucking excited it hurts.


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Why Can This Family Not Take ONE Normal Picture

We did a lot of touristy stuff today. Top of the Rock, NBC Studio Tour, both VERY touristy. So you think when you do this stuff, you might get a couple of good photos right?

WRONG! At least not when you are a part of the Dias family. Dad apparently hates to look at the camera, mom seemingly doesn't like to smile when the camera is on here, and then there is me. I look like a toothy retard in almost every pic.

So what does that leave us with?

Here they are:







The last one is my favorite. Dad totally didn't get this whole concept of the self-picture (one of my personal favs). He was sooo confused!

The Top of the Rock was really quite cool. We got to see basically the whole city. NBC Tour was also really great. Saw the SNL Studios, the Dateline studios and a bunch of other NBC stuff. I was hoping to run into Peter Petrelli, but he wasn't around.

I then went to the airport to pick up Jarod and Steve. A seperate post is necessary to fully describe the Jarod, Steve and Iris portion of this trip.

I need sleep.


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Merry Effing Christmas

Have I ever mentioned that I hate Christmas? I hate most celebrated holidays, you know Easter, Valentines' Halloween. Hate'em!

This year was no different. Sure we were spending it in NYC, but this doesn't make this time of year any more exciting to me. Bah Hum Bug is my general disposition, and I am ok with this.

The one thing I was actually excited for was the Giants game yesterday. It was VERY cool to see how Americans celebrate this sport. Tailgating galore. There were at least 8,000 ppl in the parking lot drinking and pre-gaming for the game. Can you imagine?

The game itself sucked. The Giants were blown out, but let me tellya, Reggie Bush is one bad ass mother. He was pure football entertainment. Eli was a joke, and Shockey embarrassed himself. Meh, I didn't really care what happened, b/c no matter what, the Raiders weren't making it into the playoffs. (But #1 draft pick here we come!! YEAH BABY!!!)

That was the end of yesterday, ordered some cheap Chinese food in and just hung out.

Today was relaxing. Mom and Dad went to church, and understanding the fact that I neither believer in the Catholicism or religion in general, they didn't push. They came back, we hung out for a while and then went for dinner.

Because of poor planning skills, we didn't really have any idea where we were going. We had made resos at the Boathouse in Central Park, but we weren't really feeling it. So we went to the Meatpacking District. Initially, I thought we would walk around the West Village and find a cool restaurant, but it was raining and we ended up at Markt, AGAIN.

The food was great, as per usual, and dad liked it, which is rare, and he didn't complain about prices, which is UNHEARD OF!

All in all it was a good Christmas. I am thinking of converting to Constanzaism so, next year will be Festivus for me. Or at the very least Kwanza. I need a random holiday to validate my already random existence.


Now for the airing of grievances ... how is that different than any other day of the year??



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National Dias' New York Vacation

The majority of this trip is going to be spent with my family. Don't get me wrong, I adore my parents. They are good people with many quirks - which is probably where I get it from. Today was day one of the vacation. My father hasn't been to NYC since the 70's and doesn't really understand why I want to be here so badly. My mother gets it, as she was here earlier this summer.

Today began fairly normally. My family taking far too long to get ready and me being VERY hungover. We FINALLY go on our ways. We take the subway to the Brooklyn Bridge to see the WTC site, the NY Stock Exchange and Lower Manhattan. This is them in front of the Brooklyn Bridge. It is just so them. Mom trying to tell dad how to stand and to smile. Hahaha, they are ACTUALLY crazy.

We then made it down to Wall Street etc. Our trek to Battery Park we see the most random thing in the world, a turkey. A TURKEY! Wandering around Battery Park just hanging out.

After running into the turkey, we make our way up to Times Square. I HATE Times Square. It is crowded with tourists who move WAY too slow and don't realize they are in NY and that walking that slow is pissing people (me) off. But dad wanted to see it, so I sucked it up. We saw where we wanted to be for New Years and all of that. We then went to 5th Ave and Rockefeller Center. The tree is even prettier at night. Still a gross amount of consumerism, but what the hell right, it's all for Jesus' birthday.

I also got to see the displays at Bergdorf Goodman's. These displays are legendary, and they totally lived up to the expectations. Interesting displays that are intricate and perfect. The details are incredible.

Other than that, we had a nice day. I needed a break, and thank god for Brandy Chorney because she called at the perfect moment for me to take a break from my family.

I am pooped now and need to sleep. I got dad the best Christmas gift ever! We are going to the Giants-Saints game tomorrow. He is the one that introduced me to football and neither of us have ever been to an NFL game. His response to the tickets "Iris, there are serious playoff ramifications associated with this game" I love it. I really do think I might be the coolest daughter in the HISTORY of daughters. Haha, ok, probably not, but this is going to be killer fun. Tailgating, drinking in the middle day and watching some killer football.

I will post again tomorrow. Amazing how life becomes more interesting when on vacation.


Red 45, Red 45.


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Weirdest Day EVER!

Well today was .... interesting.

I live my life in a manner that is sort of mundane. I go to work. I hang out with friends. Nothing in my day-to-day existence is spectacular. And today wasn't spectacular, but definitely out of the ordinary.

I started my day barely scraping myself out of bed. I think this past week of not sleeping has FINALLY caught up with me. I have slept more in the past two days than I have in the past two weeks. So that part was nice. I get out of bed and decide to go consignment shopping. The upper east side has some amazing consignment shops and they all carry these brands that are unheard of in Alberta. While I didn't find anything, I am sure I will, as there are many more to hit.

I then went to the midtown area and hit Rockefeller Center. I saw the tree. Let me tell ya, it is FREAKING HUGE! This thing looks like it has been growing for about a million years and the consumerism that is us has cut it down to decorate it and put it on display ,,, ANYWAYS. It was very pretty though, and the star on it was beautiful.

Well I continue on with my day and call a guy I met on the plane on the way here. Really nice guy, a little older, and seemingly cool. We decide to meet for drinks. On the way to meet him for drinks I sit down to relax for a minute. While I am relaxing, I meet another dude. Again, seemingly cool. So we exchange digies and I think all is good with the world.

WRONG!!!

I go for a drink with the guy I met on the plane. We are hanging out, having a good time and then he drops a bomb bigger than the bomb on Hiroshima ... he non-chalantly informs me he is MARRIED!!! WTF!!! No, What the fuck! How are you out on a date with me???? It obviously ends there, because I am far too big of a believer in karma to let this shit fuck me up.

I graciously leave, thank him for the drink and go on my merry way.

I then go and meet up with random guy on the street. First of all let me brag for a second. He is a Dolce and Gabanna model. He actually has a billboard that I saw. Holla ... I went out with a model!!!! AHHH

This is where the coolness ends. When he wants to "Go back to his place" and I saw no he actually says "You don't know what you are saying no to" ... Ummm, yeah I do and I think I just did say no to it. What is with these people?

No wonder dating is so hard. You meet a guy, and you think he is cool, sure a little old, but that hasn't stopped me before, and well, he is married. Then the next guy is a loser model. What the fuck! There is a reason I have remained single for all these years, and today was the culmination of all these reasons. I never want to meet a guy again! EVER!

Ok, that is a lie, but next time can they not be married and not be someone with the ego the size of the Nortwest Territories!?


Thanks! I appreciate it.


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Shallow Like A Puddle

This is how I have described myself on numerous occasions. I am. I like clothes and pretty things, and I like to look good. So sue me.

My shallowness has left me in a bit of a conundrum. I am here in NYC, one of the fashion capitals of the world, and feel very inadequate. I love my clothes, but I want to look GOOD! Not just ok. Stuff that is fine in Edmonton, well is it ok here too? It wasn't that big of a deal this summer, because summer clothes are whatever, sandals, tank top and shorts. Easy, winter is when the clothing decisions become harder. Do I go with a chunky sweater or a light top and layer it? If I layer it, will I look chunky? And shoes! Winter shoes aren't nearly as pretty as summer shoes. ARGH! I have been pacing in this small apt for an hour trying to figure out what to wear to go shopping. And it also sucks because I don't have anyone to bounce outfit ideas off of.

Ok, I am going to peel myself off this chair, and go into my bedroom and find something, ANYTHING to wear. Wish me luck.

Wow, I am REALLY superficial.


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