I have always been the youngest in my family and amongst most of my friends, not to mention the eternal single girl. And I've always loved it - both positions allow for a certain degree of irresponsibility, which I bask in.
While I love being the youngest and love my single life, they are currently causing me to move away from my friends.
You see, most of my friends are all grown-up.
They have houses, and significant others, and children, and real grown-up worries.
I, on the other hand, am amassing frequent flyer miles, a lot of random stories, and pretty much standing still.
These people that have helped me grow are now grown. They have their own lives to worry about and comparatively, mine feels somewhat insignificant.
Not that they would ever make me feel like that. Never. They are too classy for that - and smarter because I would raise some serious hell.
But here I am, wandering through an insignificant existence. With nothing to show other than some fabulous shoes and a pretty decent wardrobe, there is actually nothing significant about my life - right now. God do I hope that this is a right now thing.
My biggest worry - this blog will be my only legacy. No kids. No great love. Nothing beyond a few unimportant words on the internet.
sigh.
As Sir Isaac Newton stated: A body persists in a state of rest or of uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force.
I need an external force. Something fierce.
5 comments:
im not convinced any of what you described here relates one way or another to one's level of significance. my house, career, live in boyfriend and landscaping plans are no less significant than my great brand new kate spade pumps with silky little powder puff bows on the toe...in so much as they make me happy, reflect my taste, are a symbol of my success and I feel good in them...how often can one's legacy make you happy, right- NOW
I completely understand the gradual space that grows between friends as they walk in different directions, but take it from me, it happens with or without what you may consider "significant life changes"
jo
But everyone thinks our lives are so great and fun. It's all about perspective
Those two are exactly right.
And it saddens me to hear you say that you're living an "insignificant existence" -- you're very significant to me, and surely many others!
Your legacy is YOU and your impact on people lives, like myself and your other friends. That's more important than a child/house/etc. in my opinion.
Lastly, having grown up worries is overrated. I bet most of your 'adult' friends are envious of you, though they would probably never say so. Keep living the single, carefree life because tomorrow we could be dead!
Ok, so where this is all coming from: For the first time in my life, two of my best friends had a convo that I had very little to contribute. Their lives, with their families and worries about the future, felt so much larger than mine. My biggest worry was who was going to hangout with me on a Saturday night.
I love my life, but this day, mine felt relatively small in comparison.
Stop comparing, you'll feel better.
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